Healthy Relationships & Teen Dating Violence - a Guide for Parents

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10 hours ago
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We're almost through Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month. To wrap it up, here's a quick guide for parents with tips on how to approach this subject- and how to handle an issue.

A Quick Guide for Parents of Teens

What Does a Healthy Teen Relationship Look Like?

Mutual respect
Honest communication
Trust
Independence and personal boundaries
Conflict handled without fear or intimidation

Healthy relationships support teens’ confidence, growth, and emotional well-being. It should be just like having a best friend.

What Is Teen Dating Violence?

Dating violence is not just physical. It can include:

Emotional abuse: insults, humiliation, manipulation
Controlling behaviors: jealousy, monitoring phones, isolating from friends
Sexual abuse: coercion or ignoring boundaries
Digital abuse: constant texting, threats, tracking locations

Warning Signs Parents May Notice

Sudden changes in mood or behavior
Withdrawal from friends or activities
Anxiety around phones or social media
Making excuses for a partner’s behavior
Low self-esteem or fear of upsetting a partner

How to Talk With Your Teen

Ask open-ended questions
Listen more than you speak
Stay calm—even if you’re worried
Avoid judgment or immediate punishment

Conversation starters:

“What do you think makes a relationship healthy?”
“How do your friends usually handle jealousy?”
“If a friend felt unsafe in a relationship, what would you want them to do?”

If Your Teen Shares Something Concerning

Thank them for trusting you
Believe what they tell you
Focus on safety and support
Seek help—you don’t have to handle this alone
If they are in danger, call 911.

Remember

Teens may not always ask for help—but they notice when adults listen
Ongoing conversations matter more than one big talk
Your support can make a lasting difference

Resources

If you're in Sangamon, Christian, Logan, Menard or Montgomery County, call Sojourn's HOTLINE- 217-726-5200

Other resources are:

Love is Respect: Loveisrespect.org is a project of the National Domestic Violence Hotline, this resource offers 24/7 support via phone, text, or chat. You can call (866) 331-9474 or text loveis to 22522 for confidential help.